Narcissistic Personality Disorder
We may have come across several narcists in our life. In fact, I lived with one for 12 years of my life. In recent history, our president Mr. Trump was hailed as extreme narcist by each and every media house in US and other countries. Even though I am not certified Psychologist or Psychiatrist , I can cite some important characteristics and how to deal with them from my own personal experience.
Main character of narcist is to keep them in spot light most of the time. Even when they are attending funeral, they want to be corpse there to get the attention. They don’t want to be in back ground.
They lack ownership for any actions. Even if they have done any misdeeds , they don’t own them. It is other’s fault. They play “victim” mindset to get sympathy from other side. My ex-wife willingly gave up custody of our son. But when people question her why she did so, she told my son is mentally ill . So she gave up. She thought if her own child is mentally ill, she is not responsible for that. In fact, my son is not mentally ill and no doctor has said so. But she demonstrated borderline personality disorder which she didn’t want to admit.
Narcissists will go to any extreme to show their powerfulness to the world and get spot light. My ex was going through diet to reduce weight when she was pregnant. She wanted to look beautiful during pregnancy. The child was born prematurely with 4 lb and 8 oz weight. They don’t care about others (including their own child) and don’t have any empathy towards others.
Even in workplace, Narcissist managers don’t care about subordinates. Their main goal is self promotion. One of my managers in previous job was written up by HR since he was not empathetic. This showed up in survey results with employees. Since he didn’t want to own his actions, he was throwing his team members under bus. His only goal was to get 100% thumbs up and he tried to eliminate everyone on the process.
In Summary, Narcissists live in their utopia. It is their self created heaven. As long as we feed to their ego, we can live inside their utopia. Else we will be kicked outside.
